reality_crossroads | New(ish) Father Blues

*Here, have a man with a tired expression of his own. One who is carefully standing out of reach.* Sadly I don't have an answer for you. Cute kid you got there, though!

The crying might be so they won't be ignored?

[Victor hits him with a flat look] Only when he's not shrieking at the top of his lungs. [he shakes his head at the suggestion] I guess, but it continues for so long, and. . .

[he pauses suddenly, taking another look at Palmer. Is it just him, or. . .does he seem kind of familiar?] Er -- do forgive me, but have we met before?

*Palmer just looks sad for a moment. Why does he have to have a movie about his life? He's trying to be beneath notice!* Do you ever watch horror movies? My life is one, apparently.

I won't hurt you, I promise.

Not usually? Though Marty had one on the other --

[And that's when it clicks where he's seen this guy before. Victor blinks a few times as it settles in] Oh. Oooh. I -- I see. Right. [he squints at the moment] It's -- Palmer, correct? You're looking -- er -- better than you did in the movie.

Let me guess, a bit more human? Probably more alive, too, I've heard it ends with everybody dead. There's a reason that I have no plan on ever fucking going back.

I'm trying not to even touch anyone, just in case. *He starts rolling himself a smoke.* Don't want to start the fucking invasion of the body snatchers just by shaking hands with somebody.

*Then he smiles a little.* Marty? Could have been the same kid who mentioned it to me. He said he might watch it again.

Um -- yes. On b-both counts. [he fiddles awkwardly with his tie] Technically MacReady and that one fellow -- Childs? -- are still alive at the end, but i-it's implied they won't last long. . . I don't blame you for not wanting to either fry or f-freeze. Neither seems like a n-nice fate.

[he watches Palmer roll the joint] Er -- no. I d-don't think any of us want that. [though he would have thought Palmer WOULD want that, based on the movie. . .but then again, he's not exactly like his movie self either, so. . .] D-do I call you Palmer, or. . . ?

McFly? About my age, short, brown hair, blue eyes? He's my cousin.

Oh, freezing wouldn't be so bad. Our ancestor survived what, a hundred thousand years frozen? But the fire . . . the fire is terrible. Not going to risk that shit.

Far too messy. Far too likely to be seen, get in each other's way or lose track of who is what. Not to mention that you lot probably don't want to get transformed or devoured or whatever you'd like to call it. *We never actually learn the Things' motives in the movie, though, do we? They just decide not to take chances.* Yeah, Palmer works. I still think of myself as Palmer, or the new me thinks of itself as Palmer, or . . . fuck, you could get an existential crisis trying to figure that one out.

Yeah, that's him. Nice kid. I'd say sweet but that would be far too easy to take the wrong way, considering what I am now. Not gonna eat him, I swear. *He'll just smoke quietly for a moment while Victor takes everything in. It's almost ostentatiously harmless.*

A hundred thou -- the ship was that old?! Goodness. . . Still, it wouldn't be pleasant, would it?

[another tug of his tie] I would prefer not to, no. I like me as I am. And I can't -- I couldn't l-let that happen to my child. [he's shuddering just thinking about it. . . Also, true -- Victor's kind of assuming goals, given the tension in the movie concerns who's been transformed and who hasn't] I b-bet you could. Palmer it is then.

[Victor can't help a smile at the joke about not calling Marty 'sweet'] He is a good kid. And I would hope not -- though I s-suppose the fact he came home safe and sound the other day is a good sign, huh?

That's how old the ice around it was. But you're right, it would be very uncomfortable to freeze. Although after a while it's almost like going to sleep . . .

Most people like themselves as they are. I doubt the old me would have asked for this. But the universe didn't wait for him to ask, so Palmer is me now.

It means I'm doing my best, yeah. *Then he's back to the joking tone.* Won't eat you either, you're a stick.

Goodness me. . .that's -- quite a long time to be stuck and preserved. . .and I wouldn't know. I hope I n-never do.

The universe rarely asks people what they want done to them. You just have to -- h-hold on and hope for the best, I've discovered.

[Victor frowns at him, then blinks] You know, I probably shouldn't be insulted by that, given it means less chance of being eaten, but. . .

A crazy long time. And I hope you don't either, you're human. You couldn't exactly survive that shit, could you?

It's a bit of a bitch that way, yeah.

*He laughs and takes a hit of his joint.* I think your priorities may not be the best on that one, no. But for what it's worth I am trying very hard not to kill or eat or assimilate people. Anything that would have horrified the original me is a no. I still have enough of that mind to share that horror.

It can be really fucking hard, though. I have to make light of it, I'm apt to go mad otherwise. I feel mad already. I keep wanting . . . *He carefully steps back, as if to say 'I'll let you go if you want to.'*

I wouldn't think so, no. [even if he DOES have the ability to pop out of his body, he doesn't think leaving it behind frozen in ice would be a good idea]

. . .it really is. But -- it can be nice too. I wouldn't have met my wife and ended up with my current family if the universe hadn't thrown us all together.

[he smiles back, nodding agreement] Probably not. . .and I'm very glad to hear that. Your movie self. . .well, I don't know. I'm not sure what he did, if anything, until his blood was tested and he -- well, 'freaked out' would be the best way to put it. But I'm pretty sure the movie was trying to imply all the Things wanted to make everyone else Things.

[Victor finds himself scooting a little further down the couch at that confession, though he doesn't immediately get up and leave -- damn him, he'd feel bad, just leaving after the guy said he's trying to be good] I'm -- I'm sorry. That sounds -- horrible.

Exactly.

Yes, I suppose that's true. My life has just had a lot of problems. Especially if you count my current life as separate.

I sabotaged the first blood test--but that's understandable enough, yeah? Didn't want to be found. *A wince.* That and I was seriously, well, I guess the word would be thirsty? Man, that sounds horrible. But if the dogthing hadn't panicked and gone for the real dogs we could have done absolutely nothing and still been safe, which was all I really wanted. Changing people was last resort for me, both from morals and logistics. When there's no way to talk to each other safely it's far better to keep things simple.

Yeah. Yeah. God, I don't mean to just dump this in your lap, but I've spent what seemed like a very long time unable to be honest. *He runs a hand through his hair. He feels bad about scaring this poor guy.* It's so hard.

Mine has too -- I've changed the very universe I live in twice, neither time without actually meaning to. And I had to fake my death in my home universe later, once we figured out a way to visit again, instead of saying a proper goodbye because it was the only way to stop my parents forcing me into an arranged marriage back there when I'd already fallen in love with Alice, who lives in a different universe. . . [he shakes his head] I know that's probably not nearly equivalent to what happened to you -- the old you? -- but still. It was at least more complicated than it ever had any right to be.

Yes, the whole point was that you and yours were hiding in plain sight. . .and it does, a bit, but -- I guess it's just your nature? [another shake of his head] So if it had been up to you, it would have been just you? [he attempts a smile] Wouldn't have made for much of a movie then.

[Victor nods a little] It's -- I'm not sure "okay" is the right word, but -- I'm trying to understand, anyway. Not judge. We've met people who in their own universe are considered evil or villainous before, but they've been friendly to us, so. . . [granted, so far none of them have been people-eating aliens -- but one of them was previously DC's Joker, sooo] I -- I don't know if there's anything I can do to help?

That sounds far too complicated, yeah. *A smile.* Marty mentioned Alice! Said she wouldn't like fire much more than I do.

I really don't like thinking about what might have happened once I really got hungry. Not many options for live food in fucking Antarctica. *He shudders.* Just me would have certainly been nice, yes. Then I wouldn't have had to worry about what the others were doing.

There's nothing I can ask of you that you're not doing already by being understanding. Well I guess I could, but . . . oh man. *He shakes his head, forcing his shattered mind away from the desires.* Yeah, no, asking for more would just be cruel. I don't want to be cruel, so I won't ask.

Oh yes. . .but all that complication led to me having a family much better than the one I left behind, so I suppose I can't complain too much. [he smiles back] She's amazing. . .though no, she wouldn't. She's not an alien, but she did lose her parents and house in a fire when she was just eight.

No, I can't imagine there are. Unless you went out penguin-hunting, I suppose. [he nods] Could have just blended in. . .well, until you got hungry, like you said.

[Victor scoots backward a little again on instinct] T-thanks. I just -- I kind of like me the way I am, you know? Plus there's the matter of w-why I came here. . .I guess you don't have much experience with babies. Are there baby Things?

Yeah, that's what he said. A shame.

We were too far inland for that, sadly. Far enough that there probably weren't any living things around except dogs and people. Maybe a few insects.

Being able to blend in would have been lovely. The hunger less so, but maybe I could have figured something out. Never got a chance to see.

Yeah. I can't imagine you want to give blood either. Don't worry, I'm staying right over here and not even touching you. *He shakes his head at the question.* I'm probably as close as it comes, I'm pretty newly made. Otherwise it would require that an actual baby be assimilated, and that's a really horrifying thought.

Edited 2020-08-13 04:07 (UTC)

It was a terrible tragedy, yes. Her aunt and uncle are very nice people, but -- we both wish I could have met her parents. Especially now, since. . . [he sighs] But there's nothing we can do about it.

Oh -- too bad. [he frowns curiously] I don't know of any insects that could survive in Antarctica. . .but then again, I'm not an expert in every species. I'm a hobby lepidopertist -- I study butterflies.

That would have been a very different movie, I think. Hopefully things will be easier for you here.

I'm not sure how I could, beyond just. . . [he makes an awkward slashing motion across his wrist] Which isn't really good for me either. [and then Palmer mentions the only way to get a baby Thing is for a Thing to assimilate a baby, and he goes pale] Yes. Yes, that -- that really is. ...You're the only one here, right?

Too often there's nothing you can do about things.

I'm not sure myself, but humans bring mice and roaches everywhere they go. I could've looked for those. *He's a bit disgusted by the thought, but food is food.* Better than starving at least. Starving or eating someone I know.

Definitely different, yeah. And I think it will be. Couldn't get much worse, right?

Yeah, not good for you at all. So I'm not gonna ask. *He nods at the desperate question.* As far as I'm aware. I'll tell you if I see anyone else from the station, man, I promise.

Far too often. You just -- have to learn to live with it.

Really? Everywhere? I mean -- I understand they'd follow the food, but -- even to Antarctica? [that's -- a bit gross, honestly] But yes, better than either one of those. H-how are you managing now?

I wouldn't think so. . .at least the anti-violence field should protect you against fire?

Thank you. [he rubs his head] Good. Good. I just -- I can see you're trying, but -- we couldn't be sure any other Thing would be too, could we?

Yeah.

If you can get mice on fucking sailing ships, you can probably find at least a couple in a research station. *His human personality agrees, but to the instincts there is no disgust. Only fascination with the life of a whole new world.* At the moment I'm okay, I can eat fruit if it's fresh enough and there are fish in the lake. Little lives I can absorb. It isn't nice, exactly, but I can kill the animals painlessly at least.

No fire is very good. I learned to hate those fucking flamethrowers very quickly.

I suppose not. If one of them made the other choice, the one to change everything around it as fast as possible and hope for the best, then we would definitely have a problem. I hope the anti-violence effect would prevent it, but if not . . .

Well, I'm originally from Victorian times, so mice on sailing ships makes more sense to me. But you've probably got a point. [he relaxes a little as Palmer confirms he has found stuff to eat/absorb] Oh, that's good. Would be terrible if you ended up here, away from all that chaos, only to find you couldn't get any food.

I think most people who aren't currently carrying a flamethrower don't like them. They seem incredibly dangerous. Too easy to hurt friend as well as foe.

[he winces] A major problem, yes. I would hope so too -- I mean, surely forcibly converting everything and everyone to Things counts as some sort of violence. And honestly, the existence of things like LOLs make me think the Nexus could actually fight back if necessary.

Victorian era, huh? Had anyone reached the South Pole yet?

Yeah, that would . . . that would not be good. Oh man. I do not want to think about what it would be like to be starving in the middle of so many people.

I didn't like them even when I was holding one. Felt like wearing a bomb on your back. All that fuel, you know what I mean?

It is forcible and all. *He looks curious--he doesn't need to eat normally, so there was less need for concern on that subject.* What are LOLs?

It was 1875 when I left, so no. It still amazes me that anyone can stay down there for any length of time.

[Victor shakes his head] I don't want to think about it either. I don't want to have nightmares tonight. [and he's not even the one who would be starving!]

Er -- not directly, but I get what you're saying. Doesn't make me inclined to ever pick one up! Not that I would anyway, given I can't see any reason why I'd ever need one. . .

[nods, then blushes] Oh, forgive me, I forgot for a moment you're new. . . LOLs are -- strange things that can happen here in the Nexus. I've personally run afoul of a camera that, when I used it to take a picture, deaged me temporarily into a child. Alice ran into it too, and got aged up about ten years. . .and my father was turned invisible. On the other hand, there were Easter eggs here for one Easter, and one I found gave me wings for a bit. [he smiles brightly at the memory] That was a lovely afternoon.

Oh, me too. Had to put on five layers of heavy clothing just to go outside, ugh. But my new nature handles the cold a lot better, which is nice. Freezing for me is what going to sleep is for you.

Don't worry too much. You and Marty have been nice to me, even if I did get to that point you would be the absolute last resort. *He shudders and smokes a bit more weed. There, that's better.* God, I cannot fucking believe I just said that. What is my life? But there you go.

Sadly wings don't scale up well, otherwise I could probably make my own. Might be able to do invisible, though, or close enough. What kind of wings were they?

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