Vroom Vroom

[dee_lorean81]

[There is a DeLorean, heavily modified, doing laps in an empty, paved part of the Nexus. One might wonder what the driver is doing -- practicing for a race? Working on their turning? Just burning rubber because they're bored?

And then one might get a little closer -- and see that there IS no driver.

. . .perhaps it might be fairer to say that the car is bored.]

Comments

[dee_lorean81]

[Dee shrugs] I dunno what to tell you. Just be grateful you came pre-loaded?

[Octopus Cashier, minding their own business] Now, do you require any special accommodations for the transaction? Anything we should know about?

[palmerthing]

*Octopus cashier is smart.* Probably a good idea to sterilize the money, but other than that it should be fine.

[dee_lorean81]

[Octopus cashier simply wants the minimum amount of customer drama in their lives] Ah -- if that's the case. . . [pulls out a special plastic box with a wide slot in the top] If you'd like to put the payment in there, we'll remove any diseases, curses, or other transferable effects from it later.

[Dee, impressed] You guys ARE prepared for anything.

[Octopus cashier] You have to be in a place like this!

[palmerthing]

*Palmer grins and puts the money in the box, then picks up the new shield.* This should help a lot.

[dee_lorean81]

[Dee nods] Once you figure out how to use it.

[Octopus cashier, putting the box away] Oh, it's pretty simple -- it clips to your clothes, and when activated, creates a small but impermeable shield over the whole body. Conforms to the lines of the limbs and everything. Very popular for those who need extra protection but can't use a proper suit.

[palmerthing]

*Palmer adds it to his belt and it hums for a moment, then lights up.* Definitely easier than a suit. *He won't have to worry about the suit breaking either, or contaminating the outside.*

[dee_lorean81]

[Octopus cashier] Hence why it's popular.

[Dee grins] Yeah, it's pretty awesome, it looks like. How's it feel? Like anything, or. . . ?

[palmerthing]

Not much or anything, no. Maybe a bit of static occasionally?

[dee_lorean81]

[Dee, glancing at the cashier] That's good, right?

[Octopus Cashier nods] According to the packaging, that's how it's supposed to work.

[palmerthing]

*With that Palmer relaxes in a way he hasn't been before, even when he seemed to be relaxing. You don't notice the kind of care he's been moving with until its gone.*

[dee_lorean81]

[Dee raises an eyebrow] . . .you really have been tense for a long time, haven't you?

[palmerthing]

Oh fuck yes. Having to focus on what I'm touching all the time is a hassle.

[dee_lorean81]

[Dee nods] Well, with this, you should be able to just -- you know, go about your business.

[Octopus Cashier] It has a twenty-year warranty, too.

[palmerthing]

Oh good! Thanks. *He's definitely remembering this place.*

[dee_lorean81]

[Octopus cashier, apparently smiling but it's a little hard to tell] You're welcome! We try to make sure everyone fully understands their product purchases here.

[Dee nods] Yeah, I imagine it gets complicated given all the different universes and such.

[Octopus Cashier] Honestly, we just don't want to process constant returns.

[palmerthing]

I can only imagine . . . *Sounds awful.*

[dee_lorean81]

[Octopus Cashier, knowingly] Retail in the multiverse is retail "hard mode," if I may say so.

[Dee grimaces] Yeah, I can bet. Hopefully you get paid well!

[Octopus Cashier, with a smirk and waggly tentacles] Still here, aren't I?

[palmerthing]

That's good. It would suck if a job that hard paid shit, I mean.

[dee_lorean81]

[Octopus Cashier, facial tentacles tangling] Mmm. I wouldn't go back and do retail in my own universe, that's for sure.

[Dee, sympathetically] Too much crap for not enough pay?

[Octopus Cashier] Here at least I'm allowed to tell customers to leave if they start screaming, and back it up however necessary.

[palmerthing]

People will actually start screaming over this? *Palmer raises an eyebrow. His old self was never the shopping-for-fun type and thus has been mostly oblivious to insane shopping behavior.*

[dee_lorean81]

[Octopus Cashier, world-weary] People will start screaming over anything. Not all people, of course, but the entitled ones. . .well, they still show up here.

[Dee pulls a face] Hope you don't have to deal with them too often.

[Octopus Cashier] This store has a very solid banning system, so no.

[palmerthing]

*Dryly* Aww, I was hoping idiots weren't allowed in.

[dee_lorean81]

[Octopus Cashier, with a tentacley grin] They're not allowed in more than once.

[Dee] You are aware that sounds vaguely ominous, right?

[Octopus Cashier] I swear that we do not kill or maim customers.

[palmerthing]

*Palmer laughs.* But do shouty idiots count?

[dee_lorean81]

[Octopus cashier] They are customers in pontentia, so. . .

[Dee] Also, being known for murdering people would probably stop ANYONE from walking in the door.