WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

[deadgirlslikeme]

A door opens, and suddenly the sound of a baby wailing echoes across the nearby chunk of the Nexus. A bleary-eyed Victor Van Dort steps through, bouncing said wailing baby in his arms. "It's okay, it's okay. . .look, we're -- um." He blinks a few times as he registers where he is. "This isn't. . .oh, dear, how did I manage to choose the wrong door?" He goes to step back through --

Then stops, shakes his head, and proceeds to the nearest safe-looking bit of furniture, still cradling his son. "No. Perhaps someone can help here. At least, Alice and the others will get some decent sleep for a change. . ." He looks up, an exhausted man at the end of his rope. "Is there anyone around who's had at least one child and might know why they sometimes just start crying in the middle of the night and won't stop no matter what you do?"

Comments

[lastest_ringbearer]

Would anyone have obeyed your orderses?

Wasss not as long as the Winding Ssstair at least. And then Her, because Gollum is a sneak! *There's something about the way he says 'sneak,' like he means something far worse.*

[save_us_alice]

[Alice shakes her head] Likely not, which is good. But it would have been more trouble for everyone around me, and I probably would have never made it out of the asylum as a result. [Victor puts his arm around her, and she leans into him -- clearly neither of them like thinking about that possibility]

[Victor frowns, puzzled] Who's -- Her? [he asks, despite not being sure he wants to know. . .he suspects she has something to do with the way Smeagol is saying 'sneak' like a swear word]

[lastest_ringbearer]

Shelob, Sauron's cat, the spider queen, the keeper of Cirith Ungol.

Gollum wanted Her to kill the one who held the Precious so we could take it back. Up the Stairs we led, but its keeper lived. Shelob was a danger, but She was not the end of the story.

We helped them more than we hurt them, for there were no safe paths to be had. If we had told them what they would face they might have kept searching for what didn't exist longer yet.

[save_us_alice]

[Both Alice and Victor look mildly horrified, though it's Alice who speaks up first] Spider queen. And here's me thinking the ones I faced in Wonderland would have to be the worst. . .

[Victor gives her a little squeeze] I'm glad he made it through. . .it couldn't have been easy! And yes, I suppose that's a good way of looking at it. Making sure they at least started the trip.

[Alice nods] Sometimes you've got to just face the danger head-on and hope you come out the other side.

[lastest_ringbearer]

Shelob was not the worst of her kind, or so the tales say. We wouldn't want to meet whoever was, Precious, for Her webs filled Cirith Ungol with cave-darkness until even poor Smeagol was blind. Gollum was too small and scrawny for Her to care about, but for mossst the pass was ssshut.

Mean fat hobbit called us a sssneak, so we didn't warn them. Went sneaking instead.

[save_us_alice]

[Victor and Alice both shudder, with Victor saying] I wouldn't want to meet whoever was worse than her either. I don't mind spiders if they're small, but. . .

[Alice, shaking her head] I think Shelob was a spider to be minded. And avoided. You're lucky she didn't consider you a decent meal. . .

[she frowns as he continues] You know, you'd think he'd realize calling you names while you were leading them somewhere probably wouldn't be the wisest course of action.

[lastest_ringbearer]

But She was anything but sssmall, yesss.

Stupid little hobbitses, they never learn anything. That one leassst of all.

[save_us_alice]

[Victor, making a weak joke] Rather more than cat-sized too, I'm imagining.

[Alice, shaking her head] Honestly, a cat-sized spider would have been bad enough. . .and it doesn't sound like he had much in the way of brain. Always be polite to the person who knows the area better than you do.

[lastest_ringbearer]

Far more.

Ssshould have left that one in the Dead Marshes, yes. What's one more body on an old battlefield? Smeagol isss too nice.

[save_us_alice]

[Alice shrugs] Well, nothing to do about it now. You're here, and he's there. At least you shan't see him again.

[lastest_ringbearer]

Better if we never meet again, yesss. True of everyone from home, that, even nice Frodo. He meant well, but it still ended bad.

[save_us_alice]

[Alice, thoughtfully] Road to hell paved with good intentions and all that. . .but if he was nice, he shouldn't begrudge you a fresh start.

[Victor nods] The past is prologue, as Dad might say. Time to look toward the future.

[lastest_ringbearer]

He was the only one who wouldn't. People are good at grudges, my love. Gollum deserveses worse, he doesss! But not poor Smeagol.

[deadgirlslikeme]

[Alice, frowning] Oh, you don't need to tell us that people are good at grudges. I still hold one against those two bloody orderlies in Rutledge who tormented me so, even now that they're past the point where they can ever do so again.

[Victor] And on the other side, I don't think Barbara Porter ever forgave me for what she thought was a clumsy attempt at a pass. . . [shakes his head] Again, you're away from all that. Let's see if we can get those sunglasses.

[lastest_ringbearer]

*Sunglasses is definitely a better topic, so off they go.*

[deadgirlslikeme]

[A little walking brings them to a section dedicated to accessories -- and there's a whole rotating rack of sunglasses standing among all the rest. The styles are -- varied, to say the least. Alice gives it a little spin, looking at what's on display] Something for just about everyone!

[Victor, with a glance at Smeagol] Probably just plain black would do best in this case.

[lastest_ringbearer]

*There is absolutely nothing that can make sunglasses look good on Smeagol, and he's at least somewhat aware of that fact, so he'll let them choose.*

[deadgirlslikeme]

[He's certainly not going to look good in the classic solid black shades. . .or aviators. . .Victor finds a rather nice pair with smoky black lenses in a plain metal frame and offers them to Smeagol to try on]

[lastest_ringbearer]

*Probably about the best they're going to get.* That is much more easy on our poor eyeses, my love. No more nasssty brightness.

[deadgirlslikeme]

[Victor smiles] Good, I'm glad! Most everything is probably too bright when you've spent so much time in caves and darkness.

[Alice ticks things off on her fingers] All right, sunglasses, clothes. . .now for the chair, I think.

[lastest_ringbearer]

Chair, yesss! But where will Smeagol put it? Home cannot be reached any longer.

[deadgirlslikeme]

[Alice blinks] That's -- a good point. But I'm pretty sure I've heard of places to live in the Nexus. . .of course, we'd have to find one that allows people to stay for free.

[Victor looks around, making a joke] Honestly, with how big this place is, you could probably live in here if you were careful about it.

[lastest_ringbearer]

Too many people here. *Said with all seriousness, since for all he knows people live here already. The Nexus is more than odd enough for that.*

[deadgirlslikeme]

[Victor is willing to take it seriously, though for a different reason] That's true -- who knows how busy this store can get. And that's not even counting the employees, who might object to someone living in their store. . .

[Alice, thinking] Maybe there's an unclaimed spot where you could set up a home of sorts? Not in here, but in the Nexus in general. It has a little of everything, after all. . .

[lastest_ringbearer]

We will look, once this isss done.